week 44...
in the spotlight


Well, you know my name is Kevin, and the things I draw come true...
Winer Notes:
Full Name: Sydney Grant Winer
Anagram of Full Name: Dysentry Warning

Age: 39
Home: Adelaide
Suburb: Joslin
Street: Werrina

Job: Photographer
Other Job: Writer
Mags: Velovision, Outdoor Australia
Photography, Cycling, Painting, Comic Books

Claim to Fame:
In the movie "Julie Moon" Liza Minelli once said: "It's that horrible Sydney Winer next door!"
meet syd winer
This is Syd. Sure, he may look like a sociopath, but... well, let's find out more about him, shall we?

How did we end up at your place? I read about you guys in Australian Cyclist, and I've pretty much been following you ever since. Good thing, or else you might be sleeping on someone else's lounge room floor and I wouldn't be able to pick your feeble brain.

I notice you don't have a car, or much stuff for that matter. I like to live, ahem, Spartanly. You know, be ready to up and move at any moment.

But, I mean, you don't even have any chairs. Or spoons. I have one chair, at my desk. And I rarely entertain. How many spoons do you have?

One. Well, there you go. I like to think I could hop on the bike and go whenever I want.

Where've you been? I spent a year in Chile and Argentina, going nowhere in particular. I said to myself I'd go south until the end of summer, then north until the end of winter, then back down to my starting point. Other than that, I've pedalled around Europe, all around NSW and Victoria, and up the Murray River on a kayak.

The guts of Syd's pedal kayak.
Don't you mean "paddled?" Nope, pedalled. I have a pedal kayak.

What's a pedal kayak? It's a gadget that sticks out the bottom of the kayak that swishes back and forth like swim fins. It's actually faster than paddling.

One last question: Who's the first girl you ever kissed? Man, I don't even know the first girl I ever slept with. I mean, I remember her, just, not her name.

One of Syd's pet peeves is Web Polls. In fact, he goes out of his way to skew the results. We asked Syd if there was anything he wanted to ask the good honest people of Beimers.com. Apparently, there was...

Do you think Web Polls are inaccurate?
Yes    No        

Check back here for the result in the weeks to come!
Hey losers. This is Mr. Skinnylegs. You met me last week, but you probably don't even remember because you're so stupid. Anyhow, I joined this trip on Monday, and Kevin and Aimee wanted me to help out on the site. So, I'm going to be filling you in on all the reasons why Australia sucks.

Don't like my idea? Like I give a snot. Why don't you go lick a fencepost with your boyfriend Wally.

Anyway, I'll be around. Later, dorks.

Keep those eyes open for Mr. Skinnylegs, and his new column,
I Reckon That's Crap.
Debuts next week, only on Beimers.com!
these are the people in our neighbourhood...

The Gawler newspaper, the Bunyip, is hot on the trail of local news stories. Heidi pulled her car over on a busy Adelaide-bound road to schedule a quick interview. Lucky for her, we needed an excuse to get out of the morning rush! Thanks Heidi! You were nice!
Our second drive-by interview in one day! Cameron left his car parked on the side of Bridge road to intercept us on the bike path, thus giving us another excuse to take a much needed traffic break. Looking forward to our spread in the Salisbury Messenger!
we get picky 'bout dickie's bikkies...
Australia's favourite knock-off artist, Dick Smith, has just tackled Arnott's Tim Tams with a vengeance. Dick's brand of Tim Tams, cleverly named TempTins, just reached the shelves at Wooleys, and profess to be cheaper and better than the original.

So... WE PUT THEM TO THE TEST! A blind taste test (okay, we just closed our eyes) asked two questions... Which one is the real Tim Tam, and which one do you like better? Here's what happened:

The Tim Tam cookie was much flakier, but the TempTin chocolate was much spicier. I had the TempTin first, and if I didn't have the Tim Tam to compare, I would have been fooled. In fact, I was.
Guess: Incorrect
Preference: Dick Smith

On first taste I thought the genuine article may be a fake, but one bite of the TempTins and I realized they weren't the real Tim Tams, though I must say that I did enjoy the subtlety of their flavour.
Guess: Correct
Preference: Dick Smith

Pitting one against the other really hit me with the distinctive flavours. Dick Tams seemed harsher, with more biting cocoa flavour. The Timmy was... softer somehow. Both tasty though.
Guess: Correct
Preference: Arnott's

A final note for the untrained eye, and mouth...
How can you tell if your host is serving you the real deal? If you take the time to compare, you'll notice a few idiosyncracies of each. First, the colour. Tim Tams have a warm brown chocolatey colour, and held up next to a TempTin, Dick's looks rather pale, almost grey. (The packaging also is a little less appealing. Should have brought out the Pantone Colour Matcher before greenlighting the Dick pack.)

Like Aimee says, the Arnott's was flakier, and as a result, seems a little bigger when held up to each other. And as for price, the savings are pretty paltry. You're better off getting Home Brand Triple Croc if all you care about is price. Otherwise, the choice is yours!
wally's amazin' facts!
Vegemite is Australia's favourite spread, next to Nicole Kidman in Woman's Day. Sure, it's a great source of Vitamin B, but did you also know that it's a byproduct of beer? Vegemite is a yeast extract, which means it's pretty much made of the stuff that they scrape out of the beer vat when the fermentation process is complete. Yummers!

This Week's Amazin' Fact: Glenelg is a palindrome! Neat!

Next week, I'll tell you all about Australia's oldest marsupial! I've even got a picture of the big lug!

Don't forget to look for Wally this week!
Distance this week: 141kmDistance since Day 1: 12238km

What is Bikeabout? Click here to find out!

Day 302: He's got legs
Distance Travelled: 76.0km Temperature: 15
Time on Trikes: 6.5h Water Left: 1.0L
Terrain: Downhill with a tailwind
End Location: Shanahan Rd, Templers
no skin off my back
We really wanted to strap Caitlyn onto the trike and bring her with us, but we had to settle for a less squirmy member of the Hill Family: Mr. Skinny Legs.
   That's right! We've escaped with Mr. Skinny Legs strapped to the front of our bike. Will he prove to be good luck? Will he throw off the vibe of the expedition this late in the game? How will he get along with Wally? Will he melt in the rain? Only time will reveal how our lives will change now that Mr. Skinny Legs is part of this adventure.
   Is it a bad sign that we've had to constrain him with duct tape?

Syd's Diary: We haven't actually arrived at Syd's house yet, but starting tomorrow, you'll see what it's like for a host when we stay over! Check it out!

"You know why I can't bake? I don't have any respect for yeast. Yeast or baking powder. I can't imagine that not having exact measurements could possibly screw up my baking, but it always does. I mean, what's one little teaspoon of yeast going to do in all that white powder? Ask yourself this: Why are we completely out of flour, but I still have two packets of yeast left?"
- Aimee, on yeast.
Day 303: Y'all Up In My Grill!
Distance Travelled: 60.0km Temperature: 19
Time on Trikes: 8.5h Water Left: 0L
Terrain: Commuter Traffic
End Location: Sydney's Lounge Room Floor
syd says...
Syd said that we should call him the day before we head into the city because he'd be able to guide us in the easy way. Like we needed a guide! We just followed the big fat orange roads on our map...
   Thanks to our reluctance to accept other people's advice, we've racked up 12,178 kilometres of quiet outback and farm driving and 60 kilometres of city driving. Before today: essentially zero city driving. That meant that our ride into Adelaide was a laugh a minute. Especially that part where we had to go through the contruction intersection and traffic had to stop on all corners and we had to be guided through. And that time where we spent six hours yelling at the top of our lungs to be heard above the traffic. Yeah... that added to the atmosphere. And who could forget when we almost peed our pants trying to find the next petrol station because you can't pee in the bush in the city. That could have been embarrassing.
   We learned three lessons today: 1) Listen to Syd. 2) Pick yourself up an Adelaide BikeDirect Guide. 3) Never pass up an opportunity to use the bathroom.

Syd's Diary, Day 1: Poor Canadians have learned a thing or two about Australian cities - namely that suburbs and thick traffic radiate for 50km even in small cities. "But we didn't cry" they cried...

"It didn't taste as good because it wasn't stolen."
- Syd.
Day 304: Bow Bow!
Distance Travelled: 0.0km Temperature: 13
End Location: Adelaide
fume highway
Today was a work day. That means it was interesting for us, boring for you. However, we've still managed to provide an amusing photograph, thus upholding the standards of beimers.com hilarity and still doing our part to keep you giggling each and every day. Go on, say thank you.
Syd's Diary, Day 2: Undeterred by the loungeroom floor debacle Aim and Kev sent up a third world squatter camp...

"These ARE my fashion pants."
- Aimee.
Day 305: FLASH!
Distance Travelled: 0.0km Temperature: 10
End Location: Adelaide
what'll they think of next?
Man! These polaroids are fun! It's like, holy frickin' frack!, you can just point the camera at your subject, click the button and kaBAM - out pops a picture!
   You get to look at it right away! And guess WHAT?! If you don't like that photo, you can just toss it in the bin! Just like our digital! Except each photo costs two dollars, instead of free!
   Incredible, the technology these days. Just incredible.

Syd's Diary, Day 3: What, you're still here? "Yes we are, and excuse us, we have work to do."

"You get back to work and I'll get back to Tin Tin in the Land of the Soviets."
- Kevin.
Day 306: To The Mall
Distance Travelled: 0.0km Temperature: 11
End Location: Adelaide
getting a rise

Kev's Day: Hey sportsfans. Finally got a chance to ditch the wife and go do guy things with Syd! It's Boys Night Out! Yeehaw! Syd and I went to see Terminator 3, a bang-up smasheroo with enough explosions and death that I don't need to see another movie for months! BOOM! KAPOW! Vote Arnold for Governor!

Aim's Day: La dee da, I'm a girl, I love to shop and spend money! Lee lee lee, skippity skip! I'm going into the makeup store while Kevin watches his boy movie that I'm to STUPID to UNDERSTAND and anyway it doesn't have any KISSING in i-- HEY GIVE THAT BACK!
Sorry everybody, that was just Kevin, pretending to be me. Dork.

Syd's Diary, Day 4: Although she won't say it, I think she is disappointed to find that "Australia's longest pedestrian shopping mall" is neither especially long, nor equipped with shops that can't be found everywhere else.

"Living in the snowy mountains for so long then moving to Adelaide gave me a whole new appreciation for scantily clad women."
- Syd.
Day 307: Paint by Numbers
Distance Travelled: 0.0km Temperature: 13
End Location: Adelaide
you won't see this on vh1
We get a lot of emails from people asking us how we do the cartoons on each page. Okay, so we've had one guy write in and ask. Thanks for caring, Ben Wright. This one's for you.
   Today is special. Today, we give you a never-seen-before, behind-the-scenes look at how we do the artwork on beimers.com. Today, we give away the secret recipe.
   A lot of you may have thought that we create the 'graphics' you see on a computer. This just isn't a feasible option on a bike. To do the graphics digitally, we'd have to carry around a computer on the bikes, and as you know, it will still be a number of years until a computer is smaller than an entire room.
   In fact, no part of this site is originally created on a computer. We have much more humble roots here at beimers.com. We like to get our hands a bit dirty. We've found that a combination of foam core board, acrylic paint and a few cheap brushes bring out the best in us.

The process is deceptively simple:
Step One: Pick yourself up a nice big piece of foam core board, a tube of black acrylic paint and a few crummy brushes. We usually carry a few 3' x 5' pieces along on the bikes with us just to be prepared. They're light and they make great sails when we've got a tailwind.
Step Two: Assemble the props and build the set. Take a look at Week 41. You see how we're all fifties-style? Well, we had to build that entire set before we began putting paint to paper. More to it than you thought, isn't there?
Step Three: Here's where our artistic genius (and patience) comes in... we take turns posing on the set while the other person does a rough sketch on the foam core board.
Step Four: Once the image is sketched, it's that time to get our hands dirty. In a time-consuming process, we paint each character, background and bike. After hours of sweat and tears, voila! A finished painting.

   Next time on the Discovery Channel's Internet Magic: How do the paintings get onto the computer? See you next time!

Syd's Diary, Day 5: What, you're still here? "Yes we can't leave, it's still raining and our clothes are frozen to the line"...

"Can you make me look like that girl in the calendar?"
- Kevin.
Day 308: Cheeky Bugger
Distance Travelled: 5.3km Temperature: 13
Time on Trikes: 0.5h Water Left: 0.0L
Terrain: Back streets
End Location: Adelaide
ready for my close-up
I'm excited. I've never had a photo shoot before. I mean, people stop us every day to take our picture. But I don't think caravaners are professional photographers. There's been all the local newspapers that have taken our picture, but they don't count. And there was Pierre, the cool French photographer who took us to the beach and had us pose all neat-o-like. That kinda counted, since he was French.
   But I've never been in an actual studio where there are backdrops and lights and lots of books with artsy naked people in them. This place is too cool for dorks like us.
See the results of The Adelaide Sessions below!

Syd's Diary, Day 6: Thanks kindly to the sponsors of the Dynamic Duo for the 3 pizzas delivered by the unnamed Dominos Pizza Boy...

"Pizza Hut Sucks!"
- Domino's Delivery Man, posing for photo.
texta: (n.) marker, usually part of a set, used for colouring. Originally a brand name for a type of marker, the noun and proper noun have become synonymous. Like "Kleenex", or "Koolaid".
"Mum! I need some textas for Mr. Nurmi's geography class!"

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